Perilous Crystal Caves Website

Ship's Log - Stardate 2121.93
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Personal Entry - Record Mode On:

Forget the farming business, I've had enough! Fortunately, I saw a program on Galactic Cable Vision than changed my life!

Mr. Rip Eweoff was selling his technique to buy real estate with no money down. Finally, I'd seen the light!

My plan is to return the crystal caves to acquire the necessary funds to develop my real estate venture - A vacation resort!

Personal Entry - Record Off.

Ending Dialogue:

Your dreams of the most fantastic vacation resort in the galaxy can now be realized.

You turn the Kiwi towards the familiar Galactic Trading Post.

Later that day...

Mylo finally got enough to buy his very own solar system, which he planned to make into a vacation resort.

The inner planets would be for swimmers and tanning, the outer planets would have ski resorts and the middle all the lodging and tourist shops.

Mylo docks and boards Mr. Rip Eweoff's ship at the solar system, ready to sign the Deed.

In Rip's Ship...

"Glad you could make it, Mylo."

"Sorry, I'm late, but I had to clean a few Twibbles out of my ship's anti-plasma fuel port."

"Twibbles, huh. I bought one once, and now I've got 400. Anyway, I'm in a bit of a rush, can we get down to business..."

Rip pulls out the deed and puts it quickly on the table.

"Mylo, just sign here on the dotted line and she's all yours, heh heh heh."

"Well...shouldn't I read this first? You know, all this fine print..."

"No, no, no, no - that's just lawyer talk, it means nothing to you and me, heh heh heh."

"Well, I guess, if you say so."

Mylo signs the document and returns to his ship. Seconds later Rip's ship goes into hyperspace.

Mylo stands near his ship's viewport, a happy man.

Finally rich, he thinks to himself. Finally rich.

As he turns from the view, he notices a bright flash.

KKAAAAAABBBOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!

A Terrible Second Later...

Mylo barley escapes with his life as the star he just bought erupts into a fiery supernova.

The Millennium Kiwi rocks and tumbles as shock waves pummel Mylo senseless.

"What a bummer."

Mylo speeds away from the blazing inferno realizing he's blundered again.

Two Weeks Later...

Barely recovered, Mylo returns to the spot when he used to own a solor system. All that's left marking the location is a big, stupid cloud of colorful vapor and dust.

"Rats, I buy a solar system and I get stuck with a nebula."

Suddenly Mylo has the first real brainstorm of his life!

Six Months Later...

"Welcome to Mylo Burger, can I take your order please?"

Two teenagers in their space van order their meal.

"We'll take two Mylo Burgers with mayo, two Solar Fries and a couple of Mylo Mocha Malts."

"That'll be $59.95 at the first window. Please fly through."

Mylo Burger is Born...

Finally, one of Mylo's ideas has paid off!

Ever since he opened Mylo Burger, overlooking the brilliantly colorful nebula, his burger stand has been the hottest hangout in the galaxy.

Now he's even thinking about franchises - but first he must wait for other stars to explode!

A Happy Mylo...

In the meantime, Mylo will relax and count his cash until his next great adventure takes him into the vast unknown of space...

...The Final Frontier. These are the continuing voyages of Mylo Steamwitz. To boldly blunder where no adventurer has trekked before. To seek new treasures and profits...

The End...?

Mylo versus The Supernova: Story